Band History? 
Ewan: None! Is that loud enough? 
Greg: There's only future with Snout. 

What about the other two guys who used to be in the band? 
Ross: Oh. I just beat them to death, with a stick. 
Ewan: that's not what you told us! You said they left of their own accord. 
Ross:  yeah… um.. one of them lives here now, he works for chamberlin John Deer as the guitarist and the other guy I don't know where the hell he is, he just left as the drummer and he's a computer programmer… he went out to get a carton of milk… 
Greg: he went on a holiday to a very far away place. 
Ross: yeah somewhere in Bermuda. 

How old is Snout? 
Greg: mentally, about five. 
Ross: the name, about four years I'd say and um this line-up about two years. 

Is there any interesting story about how you met the other guys? 
Ross: um, there's very few interesting stories in rock you'll find, apart from the made up ones. 
You can make one up if you like 
Ross: um… no Ewan and I just met at a gig, I'm not really gonna make stuff up and um… 
Greg: It involves a water loving snow leopard. 
Ross: yeah and its… no one'll get it. 
Greg: …a long story. 
Ross:  and Greg I just rang to get someone's phone number, so that's about it. 

What was the first record you ever bought? 
Ross: um, it would've been a Beatles record, I mean apart from things I was given. 
Greg: Lucky hip bastard. 
Ross: yeah I know, I know. 
Greg: bet there's skeletons in your closet. 
Ross: I was very daggy don't worry, or no actually, maybe there.. yeah, I should go back further, I think the first one I ever bought… 
Ewan: yeah the first record, not the first one you liked. 
Ross: well the first record I got of my own violation was probably Shizam, the song that's in Pulp Fiction and I was really young and it was at a trash'n'treasure… it was on see-through red vinyl. 

Anyone else like to share their first record? 
Greg: Can't remember. 
Ewan: besides like 1981: the Sound I think it was um… 
Ross: I had this kids record with this guy singing songs about dingoes and stuff.. but I didn't buy that but I did like it but I was five FOR CHRISTSAKE! 
Greg: I think my first record I bought for myself was Michael Jackson's Thriller… 
Ross: that's cool, I think that's going to be very cool. 
Greg: I'm fucking proud of that. 

Besides the band, what do the three of you have in common? 
Ross: um, oh besides the band… 
Ewan: hair. 
Ross: most of it's… 
Greg: its this real boy-o sort of dick jokes and stuff. 
Ross: yeah, no self esteem, sexually depressed, uh, just the usual. 

Do you find your side burns require a lot of maintenance? 
Greg: I'm still battling to be man enough to grow convincing side burns. 
Ross: I'm trying to be man enough to like get rid of them, their shrinking up into my hair, I'm getting the king of girly thing. 

Why do you think people in bands wear jumpers on stage when their obviously really hot and sweating heaps? 
Ewan: pretty much no matter what you wear you're gonna get hot on stage any way so. 
Ross: Oh yeah but you don't want to go wearing something like a polar bear outfit. 
Greg: those polar bears sure know how to have a good time. 
Ross: Yeah, oh well that's true, yeah fair point. 
Greg: Who decided polar bears have fuckin’ Australian pub accents is what I want to know, I don't think so. 
Ewan: have you ever spoken too a polar bear? 
Ross: that's false advertising really. 
Greg: that's crap. 
Ross: I could sue them. Um, yeah, no, I mean, people who are basically pretentious like us and we wear suits on stage and like I say we have no self esteem and we like to look smart cause we don't feel too good as people and that's basically it I think. 
And are you speaking for everyone in the group or just yourself? 
Ross: oh I think I can safely say speak for everyone. We're not wearing suits this time around, it's just a tad hot. 
Greg: We're feeling a bit better about ourselves. 
Ross: And a little hotter and ah we've been exercising and swimming, yeah I think its getting back to like the kind of tactile things in life. 

What's the best gig you've ever played? 
Ross: [ponders] Today. Today five o'clock, but I don't know. 
Greg: I reckon one of those ones at The Roxy. 
Ross: Yeah, yeah I'd say that's pretty fair. There was another good one like, I can't remember, it was recently… 
Ewan: Anadale. 
Ross: nah, the Anadale was terrible for me. 
Ewan: I'm thinking about our first one… it differs I think between us, one of us'll have a good one, one'll have an okay, the other one'll… 
Ross: Or one'll perceive that its been an amazing gig, you'll have an enjoyable time and the others'll be saying "no mate you played like a piece of shit" that kind of thing. 

You were in Rolling Stone this month and in the interview you were in Sydney and they said you were walking down the street and people were going "Look it's the Beatles". Does that really happen, like do you get that a lot? 
Ross: oh some people being mean to us, yeah that happens a lot, yeah people are always being sarcastic, throwing rotten fruit at us in the street. 
And how do you deal with it?  
Greg: throw it back. 
Ross: um, well Greg's a bit of a martial arts expert so he takes ‘em down a peg or two. 
Greg: I tend to kick them about the head until their down on the ground and then I piss on them… 
Ross: no usually I crouch behind them and Greg pushes them and Ewan lays the boots in… that's the order of events usually. 

How do you respond when people call you the best dressed band in Australia? 
Ross: We get pretty bored by this stage, much slapping of thighs goes on, thigh replacements… no it's pretty boring . 
Ewan: We like clothes 
Ross: Yeah, but we hear that statement its just like yawn really… 
Greg: We know. 

Do you have any fashion predictions? 
Ross: Everyone will be looking like Tim Rogers in a year. 

Why don't you include lyric sheets? 
Ross: Um, because, I think they can ah… I don't know I'm not sure… because I don't want people to think really hard about it cause it would give me like writers block. 

How do you think your old cd (What's That Sound?) differs to your new one (TNPD)?

Ross: Um, the albums... Oh different band basically.

Greg: yeah completely different band.
Ewan: better dressed.
Ross: more aware of like, it’s hard to put it, like think about in terms of music I think about the people and I know this band is more aware of the culture that we’re in, so it’s more self aware of the whole like scene.
Greg: arguably more self conscious.

Ross: yeah, and the history of music itself is that there is a better knowledge and understanding of what’s gone before and like where to take you.

How do you think you compare live to on cd?
Ross: live is…
Greg: completely different band.
Ross: yeah, no, I was talking to about this to someone the other day too. Yeah we certainly don’t try to um, oh you do try to make your record sound fairly live, you’re not trying to make it like a live show cause like um as apples are to oranges basically it’s not the same thing. For instance when we’re recording when we hit the last note of a sing we don’t go "thank-you-very-much!" or anything there’s not that kind of thing, it’s a different kind of experience.

Do you indulge in any star type cliched behaviour like trashing hotel rooms?
Ewan: We trashed our room yesterday.
Greg: Did we?
Ewan: I pulled the covers off the bed, threw them on the floor…
Ross: Willy-nilly, litter the floor with wrappers off Uncle Tobies bars.
Ewan: We pretty much make a big mess.
Ross: We’re probably more typically rock than we think we are, I found out that everyone drinks that yogurt drink on tour if they drink.
Ewan: Oh really?
Ross: Yeah yeah, it turns into like instant stomach lining, yeah so its pretty common, for different reasons but.
Greg: It’s a good hangover beater.
Ross: Yeah sure.

Do you go gigs to a lot when you’re not playing?
Everyone: Nah.
Greg: I do but I’m getting sick of it.
How come?
Greg: cause I get too much of it and its all bullshit.
Ross: And everyone’s "It’s that guy from Snout, he’s such a cunt". Except today.
Greg: Well you know it can get really awkward when people know who you are and seem to have this thing…

Do you get recognised a lot?
Ross: we get laughed at a lot. I’m not sure why that is but I’ve got a good suspicion its cause we’re ridiculous. I find it self conscious to go out and dance.
Greg: I go out to dance a lot but not…
Ross: I probably dance more than I go to a gig and that’s not much.

What do you think of people who headbang to your music : do you think "what wankers" or are you happy to see them enjoying your music?
Greg: oh yeah, if they’re having a good time that’s great.
Ross: yeah, I’ve found myself enjoying the really drunken suburban and country shows much more than the inner city stuff… um… only because I’m paranoid about not being part of the city clique you know and that’s why I enjoy all ages… I’ve met too many people after those shows that are really drunk people, it’s pretty tragic. Is this the last one is it?

We’re sort of running out, running dry on questions…
Greg: I don’t really want to go back inside.
Ross: No, you have to understand it’s a hard thing to except that maybe the last question, sort of dying a little inside. Or maybe not.
We can ask you questions meant for other bands. These are questions we asked The Melniks. We’ll just pick out some relevant questions … how old are all of you?
Ross: Well The Melniks, how old?
Greg: We range from early 30s to early 20s.
Ross: 30 {indicates Ewan}, 27 {himself}, 21 {Greg}. Perfect proportions for an alien female I believe. Would you like to answer questions as other bands? You could role play.
Enthusiastic "yeahs"
Greg: we’ll do The Clash!
Ross: No. I told you about that, now shut up about it.
Greg: I want to be Gary… (we tell him his options) Okay, Regurgitator.

How have you seen the Brisbane music scene develop over the past few years?
Greg: haven’t seen it at all. I’ve only been in town like three times.
Ross: no, you’re suppose to be Regurgitator.
Greg: oh whopps. Their going in leaps and bounds.
Ross: we basically think the scenes the biggest ______ and the sooner we get out the better for everyone.
Whatever happened to Danny Plant, your drummer?
Ross: he’s just an arrogent little cunt. No, um, I'm just translating here. No, ah, lets not answer that. Playing with Automatic now I believe, having a fine time.

What about your next release, started thinking about it yet?
Ross: oh right okay, yes we have started thinking about it.
Ewan: actually trying to find the time to rehearse the stuff and get it all together so its sort of getting close… sort of running out of time…
Ross: very jump street isn’t it.
Ewan: it’ll never come out basically.
Like our fanzine
Ross: oh, okay well we’ll just be inside.

Say if Snout self destruct tomorrow do you have any other talents to fall back on? Say the circus…
Ross: Not as such. We’ve all got a few strings to our bow.
Greg: Yeah, what does that mean?
Would you {Ross} like to expand on that at all?
Ross: No no, we don’t… ah, well um I can paint but I don’t really do that and I’m not going to… I’m a pretty good storeman but I’m not going to do that either.
Ewan: I could talk for the rest of my life if I had to.
Ross: If there’s a position opening up for a shit talker in Queensland you could move up here…
Ewan: Yeah
Ross: Beautiful one day, perfect the next.

Do you sit around and jam all day?
Ewan: Yeah, toast and jam.
Ross: Oh, boo.
Ewan: No. I’ve got friends that I jam with.
Greg: I’m always jammin’, I’m jammin’ with my Mum, jammin’ with my sister…
Ross: oh I’m jammin’.
Greg: … jammin’ with my mates.
Ross: Oh that’s what I call masturbating, sorry.

 
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