Yes I put yesterdays update up with this one at the same time. Let me explain.

Two days ago I went to work as I do Monday mornings. This was the first day in a week I had a PC in front of me, because mine magically disappeared (all my work is PC based).

Now the week before I had been sitting there just typing at the keyboard or staring blankly at the screen even though there was no computer there. My boss would come in and conversations like this would ensue:

Boss: You keeping busy?
Me: Oh, yeah you know me. (type furiously at keyboard)
Boss: What are you working on?
I think is this guy serious?
Me: Trying to find out why my screen is blank.
Death stare ensues.
Boss: Really....
Yay he is leaving, back to staring. SHIT I lost count of cracks in the ceiling.

Like I was saying before being interrupted, I had a PC on Monday, so I check my e-mail and find out that monitors are for sale cheap, bah what do I care I have a good one at home, old faithful been fine for years.

I then went and bought some fried chicken for lunch, this was very good as I like fried chicken. I remember one time when I bought some fried chicken. I bought three pieces, it was strange because when I asked for three pieces the girl behind the counter promptly informed me:

"We have to charge you more for three pieces then two."

And here I was thinking it was for free.

Now to cut a long story short my monitor blew up.

Apparently a few of you guys creamed your pants when you saw the sexy erotic art that I made available yesterday. So without further ado spank your monkeys.

Now to another topic......(insert monitor blowing up here).

I believe James has updated with some more Q&A.... hell I think he even answers a question I sent him. Try spot it....

Now onto a important topic. Penis envy.

I believe a certain comedian made a joke concerning the fact that the only reason "rude" bits were "rude", was because they were covered. He even went so far as to say if hats were worn, top of heads would become erotic. I was wondering would this lead to head envy? Would this be erotic art?

I love a man with a big head.

Instead of having women on TV sucking on straws, cigars, bottles or large flag poles (I watch too much porn) seductively, perhaps we will witness them caressing stop signs, lollipops, or shovels (maybe that will be a fetish of sorts). Money shots will consists of mucus flying from ones nose, giving head will taken on a whole new meaning.

Maybe I need to look at more porn....

For the audio experience download this.

Now you all know this tune....hey hey hey...it's Fat Albert. You remember that show which featured kids in the hood, talking to some fat slob who made the kids look into social issues. Yet liked to be called "Fat Albert". How charming.

If you listen carefully to the sound clip (which is the intro to the show), you can distinctly hear a sound that is similar to a man passing wind through his bowels, technically named farting.

So from this I have learnt:

• Fat people are jolly.
• Fat people are respected by children.
• Fat people fart a lot.

So to summarise:

Where's my chicken fooh?