Selma Bouvier

Selma is a woman forced into a life of celibacy and several fruitless marriages.

“I’d rather eat poison. My name’s already Selma Bouvier Terwilliger Hutz McClure. God knows it’s long enough without Nahasapeetapet – whatever. From now on, I’m only marrying for love. And possibly once more for money.”

Patty: Some days, we don’t let the line move at all.
Selma: We call those ‘weekdays’.

“We know something you don’t want Marge to know. Now, we own you like Siegfried owns Roy.”

"We're a package. Love me, love MacGyver."

Sideshow Bob: Selma, would you mind if I did something bold and shocking in front of your family?
Selma: All right, but no tongues.
Sideshow Bob: Although kissing you would be like kissing some divine ash tray, that's not what I had in mind … Selma, will you marry me?
Bart: Don't be a fool, Aunt Selma. That man is scum.
Selma: Then call me Mrs Scum!

Marge: Homer? Where are you?
Homer: Uh, I'm somewhere where I don't know where I am.
Marge: Do you see towels? If you see towels, you're probably in the linen closet again.
Homer: Just a second. No, it's a place I've never seen before.
Selma: Ah, the shower!

HRMMM ...