The Ten Commandments, updated for a modern age

My 14 year old son sent this to me today. I feel justified now that sending him to a church based school would not overly influence his ability think critically.

�Thou shalt shut thy mouth when politely asked, and not drone on endlessly.
�Thou shalt not use circular arguments, such as "God exists, because the Bible says so, and the Bible is True because it is God's Word."
�Thou shalt notice when thy audience is bored rigid. See Commandment 1.
�Thou shalt not use a cop-out such as "God works in mysterious ways" when backed into a corner by thine own twisted logic.
�Thou shalt use thine own imagination, and not just quote from the Bible all the time.
�Thou shalt not tell atheists what they believe, nor that thy God loveth them.
�Thou shalt not get upset by jokes about thy God. He is big enough and old enough to looketh after himself.
�Thou shalt not define how thy God worketh. Thou canst not know.
�Thou shalt not state that the Bible is consistent and hath no contradictions. Thou wouldst be a fool to do so.
�Thou shalt not say Grace without also thanking the farmers, truck-drivers and shopkeepers that actually did the work required to get your food to the table.