AKMA's Forgiving Discussion
AKMA says that Forgiving entails recognizing a wrong, looking at it clearly and honestly, assessing responsibility for it, and resolving not to permit that wrong to determine our lives from thence forward. I would add to that comment that it is not so much "resolving not to permit that wrong to determine our lives" but more resolving to allow it to determine our lives in a positive, more inclusive manner. It is my observation that feelings like anger, revenge or even just being overly crabby have the effect of being less inclusive of others - even if only for a little while. Forgivenes is thus an important shaper of our future behaviour. We can choose to be unforgiving, and shape it more narrowly, or forgiving, and shape it more widely and positively. That might then include some element of restitution or making good, or just organising things so that the offence has less chance of occurring in the future.
AKMA says that Forgiving entails recognizing a wrong, looking at it clearly and honestly, assessing responsibility for it, and resolving not to permit that wrong to determine our lives from thence forward. I would add to that comment that it is not so much "resolving not to permit that wrong to determine our lives" but more resolving to allow it to determine our lives in a positive, more inclusive manner. It is my observation that feelings like anger, revenge or even just being overly crabby have the effect of being less inclusive of others - even if only for a little while. Forgivenes is thus an important shaper of our future behaviour. We can choose to be unforgiving, and shape it more narrowly, or forgiving, and shape it more widely and positively. That might then include some element of restitution or making good, or just organising things so that the offence has less chance of occurring in the future.

